Hello mum, Mark and I sent your lantern up to you last night, it was such a beautiful evening.. clear skys and bright stars.. no wind..no rain.. we watched it climb higher and higher into the sky just heading up to the stars.. I know you got it because even though I cried so much, I could still see the moment it disappeared which is when I think you caught it... It made me happy to send it up to you.. I miss you so much I cant put it into words.. Bu comes home from France tonight, I have missed her so much its driven me crazy not being able to talk to you about my fears.. I know you would tell me she will be ok..I would love to just talk with you and hear your voice again.. Bu and I should have been setting off tonight to come and spend time with you.. I cant believe we are not doing that trip now.. I cant bear it that we wont visit you at your house again.. the tears still flow and I can not stop the pain.. I hope you are safe and happy and enjoying being an angel.. more beautiful than ever... I still cooked the beef dish for you but took it to work to share with them, everyone loved it and then thanked you! Sweet.. I have kept a little back for you if you want to pop back, I will heat it for you.. I will take Bu out for a special trip as I know she was so looking forward to us coming to see you and us all going to the zoo.. join us on our day trip.. stay by me mum.. I need you, I love you always and forever xxx